Well, it looks like I really like journaling for the end of my pregnancy- I don't mind that you all know I'm a little crazy and not as put together as some posts probably make it sound. Sometimes life is up and down and I like having a record of the realness of my emotions so here are some real feelings:
Feb. 19th:
Grant woke up and started singing....get this....Happy Birthday...
What????!!!!
Where did he even learn that song? Jay's birthday was almost a month ago...so weird.
So yah, I was thinking my kid was onto something-totally expecting a baby today...got a bunch of braxton hicks though.
Oh and we got to go on a tour of the Labor and Delivery area in the hospital. They were going to admit me! ha ha- no, we are here for a tour- that was weird though because I really could be there anytime to be admitted. Anyway the rooms were gorgeous! Just beautiful! And they have a Jacuzzi tub to labor in which seems really nice. They don't have the blow up pool- ha ha-oh well. Oh the view though was to die for with the sun pouring in. I hope I am there around 4 in the afternoon. It would just be so perfect.
Feb. 20th:
Man....taking care of a cranky child does not really make you that excited to have another one. And my attitude needed help yesterday. Today is better- he's cranky but I can give him all the love he needs and I am still excited to have a baby- wow- you just really have to keep your attitude in the right place and it makes all the difference. I know G won't always be grumpy- he's tired and needs better sleep and a better routine- all things that can be remedied. Oh and he's singing Happy Birthday again right now...maybe he learned it in nursery? That's the only other explanation because it sure seems like he knows something or something.
Feb. 21st:
Is Grant sleeping better? No.
That's all.
Feb. 22nd:
I woke up with a sore throat. Duh, I bet Grant hasn't been feeling good. It's just we never get sick. Like ever. The last time he was sick was probably last year and I just haven't known how to recognize that in a toddler- I'm such a beginner mom still. Well, so today I was fine just watching movies and hanging out since we were both sick but it turned out we pretty much did the norm. I'm glad baby didn't come today when we didn't feel good.
Friday night:
I love hanging out with Jay. He is such a good friend! Really- when you say you married your best friend, I just can't imagine having a better friend than this guy! He is funny, and sweet and thoughtful and kind and so fun. When Grant won't go to sleep on time, I find myself getting worked up because I just want to hang out with my hubs! But I just have to remember that not every night is like this and G could totally just be going through some kind of phase and it's all going to work out.
Feb. 23rd:
It just feels like the baby is NEVER going to come now. Now that I've passed up the "due date" that was in my head (37 weeks 3 days- when G was born). So I'm really trying to just focus on doing things with my day instead of just waiting for the baby- so I am planning on taking Grant to the last free zoo day on Wednesday. It's a "plan" but secretly I kind of hope we just have to pay to go to the zoo later because I am really getting excited to go into labor. I never anticipated it with Grant's and it just through me off to have it happen at 37 weeks- I just wasn't even ready to think about going into labor with him for another month almost so to have this one be everyday now, I just am waiting is soooo different. I like anticipating the birth- it gets me very excited and hopefully I can just kick this cold in the butt that I've had for a few days and be healthy and energized to birth this baby!!! I have switched too now thinking the baby could be a boy! I am thinking boy boy boy. So now I'm really confused and I'm definitely anticipating finding out the gender. I'm almost tempted to find out at my next appointment but I don't even think my doctor knows because my ultrasound was so early so even if I wanted to know now I couldn't so it has to be a surprise! AHHHH! Seriously though, every braxton hicks I have I look at my watch going, "This could be it- I'm just going to see how long labor goes" and then every day that passes I just go, "The baby is never coming- how much longer do I have to wait?" So numbers really do mean squat. I don't ever want to be checked again- it's just too much of a roller coaster on what it "could" mean.
Feb. 24th:
I woke up with regular contractions and "bloody show". Today could be the day. But now the contractions have stopped! This baby is a tease. Baby is going to have a fun personality and drive me crazy. We know that much :) Went out to eat...starving! contractions every 15-20 minutes....
Feb. 25th:
38 weeks today! Baby is HERE!!!
More to come.... :)
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